Motherhood is the most extreme measure of being alive. Times of joy, times of sorrow, times of boredom, times of exhaustion, the list goes on. The hours are 24/7, there is no sick leave, and unfortunately no PA to go with the job, but all that said it is the best, and most rewarding position you will ever have. The bonuses are plentiful and help keep you on track; the first sleep through the night, the magical first Ma Ma, the hugs and the laughter and finally “I love you” , the biggest reward of all. When your kids are in their late teens their needs and demands are not quite so high and you can semi retire ( although it’s back to sleepless nights when they take to the road!) however complete retirement is not an option for when you give birth it is a contract for life.
Everyone offers advice when you are pregnant or thinking about starting a family, and if you are like me, you will listen with a small smile playing on your lips, smugly thinking you have got this mum job covered. Boy was I wrong!
Giving birth doesn’t make you a mum; it’s the hours of worrying, second guessing yourself and doing everything within your power to keep this little being alive ( or in my case 2!) You will have bad days and good days and some that are just ok but even on your worst possible day, ( or night when you’ve been rudely awoken by a howling banshee) there will be moments that will melt your heart and make it all worthwhile. I’m not perfect and I did plenty of things wrong, but I know for sure what I did completely right; I loved them, cherished them and spent precious time with them and I will continue to do so until my dying breath.
Too many mums fall in to the trap of measuring their mothering skills against others; please don’t do it , for no two babies are the same and as a mum of twins I know that as fact! Concentrate on your baby and do what works for you both.There’s no best mum in the world award to be had but if you ever feel you are failing ( and all mums feel that at times), just look deeply into those adoring eyes gazing lovingly up at you and you will realise you have won. Be the best mum you can be – be you!
“A good mum has good days and bad days and overwhelming days and perfect days and trying days and super mum days and just being a mum days and a whole lot of love and real and crazy motherhood days.”